Phobia

Socially speaking, I just don't have it...

Let me just jump right into it! I think I might have social phobia! I like being around people and all, but I really have a fear that they are going to judge me or talk bad about me...I have a hard time doing speeches, even after the fact. Even if I get praised for my performance, I'm still shaking. If i go out with friends, I'm always wanting to make sure I don't over/underdress, because although I may get complimented on my 'fit, too much attention bothers me. I know I can be an outgoing person, and I am around people I'm comfortable with, but instead, I keep to myself.

To me, that would explain everything, as to why I don't like doing certain things by myself or when I'm in a room of strangers, I freak out and sit all the way in the back or off to the side. It makes me feel like no one can see me. Sometimes when I am doing a presentation for a client, I forget what I am saying, although I know the material like the back of my hand. I don't know. I am hoping that by me getting more involved with these organizations I am joining, and even stepping into some of these new HOMES (churches), I will become more comforatable with my environment.

Now that I think about it....it's all connected.