What It Meant To Me

When you do things like that, it makes me think...

I had spurts of thought that fogged my ability to complete my tasks for the day. Then, you shot a text. Whether you did it or not, it was from you. I felt that it was your way of saying you were thinking of me. Then, it made me realize how much I missed you for all the wrong reasons. It made me realize how you were not my match...how much I should be happy that you are not around...how fortunate I am to not have to deal with your games. And then I settled. I settled on how that's your way of saying I miss you, I'm thinking about you, I lust you.

Further thinking, led me to acknowledge that there is better and there are others who want to be mine. They want me to say, "That's my man." They want me to hug and kiss and love them up. There are others who recognized the potential as soon as our eyes met (but what took you forever to do) and are patiently waiting. You are trying to catch up. You are trying to figure out ways to incorporate yourself back into my life and end up on your happy note, of possibly getting married and having children.

Now, I sit listening to Avant's Director CD wishing he (not you) were here. Or I was there. Not really doing anything, just chilling. Just sitting and watching television, or playing a video game, or just sitting in the dark. I think about it so much, it's as if I'm already there. The feeling he gives is the most orgasmic. He lights my life...