College Life

It's been real...

As I roll around into my last few months before 'adulthood', I have reviewed my years as a college student. If I were given the opportunity to change some things, I wouldn't. I have enjoyed my time as an undergraduate, at a premier institution. There are things that I wish I had done, but because of my personality, I am not regretful. I sometimes dream of one day returning to this earth as the same person, with all events being the same, but me doing more than I already have done. For example, I would still volunteer for some organizations, but I would also be a member of the PeaceCorps. Or I would be treasurer of one of my favorite organizations as opposed to just being involved.

I have always felt that it is important to go beyond what is required of you. However, in my book, I go beyond the requirements only in interest. Yeah, a lot of people study and study and study to get the best of grades, but for me, grades aren't all that important. In the three elementary schools I attended, I was one of the top students. I got all of the awards and recognition. I won the spelling bees for my area. Throughout my time there, my fellow students would come to me in need or on the flip side, I would get picked on for being a 'nerd'. However, during one award ceremony (my last year there), another young woman was receiving majority of the awards. My class was in the back of the auditorium, and I was sitting near the end of one of the rows. My classmates, as well as other students, were looking at me as if I had stood in front of them naked. One of my classmates said to me, "Why aren't you getting these awards?!"

Now, let me put you in my position. I was fine with this young lady receiving these awards. As a matter of fact, I think I was in another world. But when my classmate said this too me, and as other students looked at me as if they were disgusted, I became uncomfortable. I think that day, I received 3 awards as opposed to the 6 or seven I had received in the previous years. I felt as if I had let them down, but at the same time, it made me feel bad, because I felt like I should have been up there. From that point on, I think I deteriorated. Instead of being winner of the school spelling bee, I was runner up because I had mispelled a word on purpose to give someone else an opportunity to be winner. I didn't care to be in the highest level reading book, Caravans, like the other two or three people in my class. I just wanted to stay in the mediocre group (which consisted also of a few students), while the rest of my class was reading below average. My teacher tested me like three times and I think I passed by one (and I still think she gave me that one point even though I missed by one).

I never really cared about my trophies and awards until I started the orchestra. I was the only viola player for what seemed to be a long time. I was doing it BIG! But then, I bordered the middle school, high school orchestra line. I was placed in both groups. I found out that what I thought was high performance, was actually below mediocre, and I was shunned to the back of my pack (not really, but it felt that way). In the 4-5 years of being in the HS Orchestra, I got maybe 3 awards. Even when I felt like I was trying or doing what the director had asked, someone would come along and do better. And once again, the look of disgust from the orchestra director. It was as if I was a figment of their imagination.

In the present, I think that instead of giving my all, I just do well, and if I get recognition, I'll continue to do well. I am proud of myself for all of the things that I did do well in, only because they were of interest to me. For example, I really enjoyed my Personal Selling professor and his class was very inspiring. I even did well on a presentation I did on my mp3 player and everyone loved it. I on the other hand was afraid it wasn't good enough. I got an A. My Accounting II professor was funny and engaging. I busted my butt to get that 'A' (really it was a C, but it felt like an A).

I am going to miss the time that I shared with thousands of other students. I wish you all well as we separate and become successful in whatever we do, whether it's being a CEO of a company on the cover of Forbes or the next bum on the streets, who really does have the cure for AIDS. We've all impacted one another in some shape, way, fashion, or form. I love you all and if you need me, I'll be there for you! Don't hesitate to get in contact with me. If you don't have my information, find someone who does. Write Oprah! Call Jerry! Hell, call my momma! It's been real!